10/13/08

If you don't agree that this is the most annoying ridiculous NFL season ever, then you must be a hockey fan.  What else can possibly NOT go as planned and cost me hundreds of dollars each week?  How many times can my top pick in a football pool lose to the worst team in the NFL? 

Here are some reasons to better illustrate my frustrations...


Reason 1.  Jon Kitna knew that week 6 would be a good week to take off.

Why?  Well not only was it a Sunday and he's about as religious as that whack-job VP hopeful from Alaska, but he must have had a vision from God that his back-up would do something absolutely absurd.

Reason 2.  Tom Brady draftees, I'm laughing at you.

Yes I had him last year during the record breaking season, and yes you drafted him this year with hopes of a repeat performance, but those high hopes were shattered in what, 5 minutes?

Reason 3.  My readers have no idea who's good in the NFL.

Just 2 weeks ago I put the Redskins waaaaaaaaaay back at #15 on my list and got torn apart by all of you!  So what happens?  Oh, I just watched them take down the Eagles in week 5, receive some love from my week 6 rankings and follow that up with a loss to possibly the worst team in NFL history behind last year's Dolphins.

Reason 4.  Hello injuries!

Name one starting receiver for the Seahawks.  Can't?  That's what I thought.

Reason 5.  A guy actually thought he could play with TWO torn knee ligaments.

Yeah, remember Barry Bonds' roid-in-law Shawne Merriman?  He thought his HGH and hat size enlargers could take him through an LCL and PCL tear?  And I thought the NFL had the best testing policy of any major sport?

Reason 6.  Cincinnati starts 0-6!

OK, nevermind.  We knew this would happen.

Reason 7.  Brett Favre is still the best.

At the young age of 39, Brett Favre changed teams and got better.  Wait, what?  I thought there was supposed to be some sort of steep learning curve that would keep him from having any success in his supposed final season?  The most touchdowns and the best passer rating in the game should have squashed that idea!

Reason 8.  We have a new Sean Alexander.

This may be a little premature, but what the hell happened to LT?  Just 2 years removed from breaking Alexander's record for TD's in a season and he's sitting 13th in the league in rushing through 6 weeks?  When names like Julius Jones, Chris Johnson, and Earnest Graham are in front of you, you know your career is about to be over with.

Reason 9.  Cowboys get rolled in AZ, and I picked it.

That's right, I picked that damn upset and actually got it right!  Of course, then the Redskins, Bears, and Dolphins all choked within the last minute and life began to suck again.  I'll give anyone $50 right now if they can find me a person that picked every game right for even 1 week this season.

Reason 10.  Did Kurt Warner almost retire mid-season?

He sure did!  Because of this hit on teammate Anquan Boldin.  I can't say that I blame the guy for thinking about walking out of the league without severe brain damage, but please Kurt, don't leave your teammates with Matt Leinart.  Stay strong brah!

Reason 11.  OJ Simpson on trial again!

Yessir he is!  Well, this time he's actually going to jail for a while.  His Lawyer even had the audacity to say that the jury had an agenda.  I don't think anyone is going to argue against that point, idiot.

Reason 12.  Dancing With the Stars tears up your calves.

Jason Taylor who had a much publicized cat fight with Bill Parcells during his "Dancing" bid, was traded to the Redskins late in the off-season.  It looks like the "Tuna" was right again!  Those high heels sure can cause random and mysterious calf injuries!

Reason 13.  Al Davis is old and f-ing crazy.

I know, I know, this is not a surprise, but his press conference to fire Lane Kiffin sure as hell was.  If you missed it, hopefully you Tivo'd that damn thing or you can check out this Youtube of it.

Reason 14.  We had 2 name changes that left our heads shaking.

Pacman went back to Adam and Chad went officially to Ocho Cinco.  For lack of a better internet term, WTF?  Well, Adam tried to attack his own bodyguard the other day and Ocho Cinco is third on his team in receptions.  Wise name choices?

Reason 15.  Detroit finally did it.

They fired Sir Matt Millen.


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